Fatherhood

I didn't dream about fatherhood.  I think I was too busy being single.  But I met an amazing woman and I knew that there was more we wanted to experience in life.   In a way I took a risk because I had the right partner.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into.  Now I'm the father of an amazing, beautiful, brave and strong little lady named Arlie.  Wow.  Some gambles really pay off but obviously it has come with its challenges.  Heck, I'm sitting in the hospital typing this.  And the wifi sucks! I think if I had the chance to tell Arlie anything it would be that my life is more complete with her.  She has challenged me to be more present and have infinite patience. She has shown me the sweetest love through her tiny soft kisses. She listens to me karaoke! I just love her.

Occasionally through all this hospital stuff I'll get worried she will resent us for whats happening.  I'm sorry Arlie.  As a parent we try to protect our children but some things are out of our control.  Its still surreal at times living in this cancer world.  I don't dare say we are through the hardest part because we really don't know.  But what I do know is no matter what dada will always be by your side. Thinking back on single me, and reflecting on what I thought about fatherhood at the time, this experience is far more rewarding and enlightening than I ever would have lived if it was still just me.  Thank you punkin. Dada loves you. 

"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”  - Elisabeth Kubler-Ross